How I came to Islam: Sara Bokker, Former Actress and Model, USA

How, Sara Bokker, a former actress, model, fitness instructor and activist gave up the glamorous Miami lifestyle for Islam and found true liberation with Islam and the Islamic dress code for women.

Sara Bokker

I am an American woman who was born in the midst of America’s “Heartland”.  I grew up, just like any other girl, being fixated with the glamour of life in “the big city”.  Eventually, I moved to Florida and on to South Beach of Miami, a hotspot for those seeking the “glamorous life”.  Naturally, I did what most average Western girls do.  I focused on my appearance and appeal, basing my self-worth on how much attention I got from others.  I worked out rigorously and became a personal trainer, acquired an upscale waterfront residence, became a regular “exhibiting” beach-goer and was able to attain a “living-in-style” kind of life.

Years went by, only to realize that my scale of self-fulfillment and happiness slid down the more I progressed in my “feminine appeal”.  I was a slave to fashion.  I was a hostage to my looks.

As the gap continued to progressively widen between my self-fulfillment and lifestyle, I sought refuge in escapes from alcohol and parties to meditation, activism, and alternative religions, only to have the little gap widen to what seemed like a valley.  I eventually realized it all was merely a pain killer rather than an effective remedy.

As a feminist libertarian, and an activist who was pursuing a better world for all, my path crossed with that of another activist who was already at the lead of indiscriminately furthering causes of reform and justice for all.  I joined in the ongoing campaigns of my new mentor which included, at the time, election reform and civil rights, among others.  Now my new activism was fundamentally different.  Instead of “selectively” advocating justice only to some, I learned that ideals such as justice, freedom, and respect are meant to be and are essentially universal, and that own good and common good are not in conflict.  For the first time, I knew what “all people are created equal” really meant.  But most importantly, I learned that it only takes faith to see the world as one and to see the unity in creation.

One day I came across a book that is negatively stereotyped in the West–The Holy Quran.  Up until that point, all I had associated with Islam was women covered in “tents”, wife beaters, harems, and a world of terrorism.  I was first attracted by the style and approach of the Quran, and then intrigued by its outlook on existence, life, creation, and the relationship between Creator and creation.  I found the Quran to be a very insightful address to heart and soul without the need for an interpreter or pastor.

Eventually I hit a moment of truth: my new-found self-fulfilling activism was nothing more than merely embracing a faith called Islam where I could live in peace as a “functional” Muslim.

I bought a beautiful long gown and head cover resembling the Muslim woman’s dress code and I walked down the same streets and neighborhoods where only days earlier I had walked in my shorts, bikini, or “elegant” western business attire.  Although the people, the faces, and the shops were all the same, one thing was remarkably distinct: the peace at being a woman I experienced for the very first time.  I felt as if the chains had been broken and I was finally free.  I was delighted with the new looks of wonder on people’s faces in place of the looks of a hunter watching his prey I had once sought.  Suddenly a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  I no longer spent all my time consumed with shopping, makeup, getting my hair done, and working out.  Finally, I was free.

Of all places, I found my Islam at the heart of what some call “the most scandalous place on earth”, which makes it all the more dear and special.

Soon enough, news started breaking about politicians, Vatican clergymen, libertarians, and so-called human rights and freedom activists condemning the Hijab (headscarf) as being oppressive to women, an obstacle to social integration, and more recently, as an Egyptian official called it -“a sign of backwardness.”

I find it to be a blatant hypocrisy when some people and so-called human rights groups rush to defend women’s rights when some governments impose a certain dress code on women, yet such “freedom fighters” look the other way when women are being deprived of their rights, work, and education just because they choose to exercise their right to wear the Hijab.

Today I am still a feminist, but a Muslim feminist, who calls on Muslim women to assume their responsibilities in providing all the support they can for their husbands to be good Muslims.  To raise their children as upright Muslims so they may be beacons of light for all humanity once again.  To enjoin good -any good – and to forbid evil -any evil.  To speak righteousness and to speak up against all ills.  To fight for our right to wear Hijab and to please our Creator whichever way we chose.  But just as importantly to carry our experience with Hijab to fellow women who may never have had the chance to understand what wearing Hijab means to us and why do we, so dearly, embrace it.

Willingly or unwillingly, women are bombarded with styles of “dressing-in-little-to-nothing” virtually in every means of communication everywhere in the world.  As an ex Non-Muslim, I insist on women’s right to equally know about Hijab, its virtues, and the peace and happiness it brings to a woman’s life as it did to mine.  Yesterday, the bikini was the symbol of my liberty, when in actuality it only liberated me from my spirituality and true value as a respectable human being.

I couldn’t be happier to shed my bikini in South Beach and the “glamorous” Western lifestyle to live in peace with my Creator and enjoy living among fellow humans as a worthy person.

Today, Hijab is the new symbol of woman’s liberation to find who she is, what her purpose is, and the type of relation she chooses to have with her Creator.

To women who surrender to the ugly stereotype against the Islamic modesty of Hijab, I say: You don’t know what you are missing.

By: Sara Bokker

Islam – The Fastest-growing religion in the world

Fastest-growing religion

The second-largest religion in the world after Christianity, Islam is also the fastest-growing religion. In the United States, for example, nearly 80 percent of the more than 1,200 mosques have been built in the past 12 years.

Some scholars see an emerging Muslim renaissance as Islam takes root in many traditionally Christian communities.

Islam has drawn converts from all walks of life, most notably African-Americans. Former NAACP President Benjamin Chavis, who joined the Nation of Islam recently, personifies the trend.

“In societies where you have minorities that are discriminated against, I think they may find an appeal in Islam,” said Waleed Kazziha of American University in Cairo.

Many moderate Islamic countries such as Turkey and Egypt are becoming more conservative.

Two decades ago, few middle-class Egyptian women wore scarves or veils on their heads. Now they crowd into special emporiums that advertise Islamic clothing.

The shift toward Islamic fundamentalism worries many in the secular world, a fear underscored when splinter groups target Westerners with violent attacks.

ISLAAM is the fastest growing religion in the world. Because Islam is a complete way of life. It tells man about the purpose of his creation and existence, his ultimate destiny, his place among other creatures and more importantly, it provides him with guidance to lead a balanced and purposeful life which will enable him to avoid the Hell-fire and be rewarded with a place in Paradise in the life after death.Simply Islaam is to “Obey Allah” (Allah is the Name of the Only One True God). Islaam is a verb in Arabic (a doing word). The one who does Islaam is called a Muslim. (Allah calls us “Muslims” in His Speech of Qur’ân).

Listen What the World says about the Fastest Growing Religion:

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in America, a guide and pillar of stability for many of our people…” [HILLARY RODMAN CLINTON, Los Angeles Times, May 31, 1996, p.3]

Already more than a billion-people strong, Islam is the world’s fastest-growing religion. [ABCNEWS, Abcnews.com]

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in the country.” [NEWSDAY, March 7, 1989, p.4]

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in the United States…” [NEW YORK TIMES, Feb 21, 1989, p.1]

Moslems are the world’s fastest-growing group…”  [USA TODAY, The Population Reference bureau, Feb. 17,
1989, p.4A ]

“Muhummed is the most successful of all Prophets and religious personalities. ” [Encyclopedia Britannica]

“There are more Muslims in North America then Jews Now.” [Dan Rathers, CBSNEWS]

“Islam is the fastest growing religion in North America.” [TIMES MAGAZINE]

“Islam continues to grow in America, and no one can doubt that!” [CNN, December 15, 1995]

“The Religion of Islam is growing faster than any other religion in the world.”  [MIKE WALLACE, 60 MINUTES]

Listen What the World says about the Fastest Growing Religion

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in America, a guide and pillar of stability for many of our people…” [HILLARY RODMAN CLINTON, Los Angeles Times, May 31, 1996, p.3]

Already more than a billion-people strong, Islam is the world’s fastest-growing religion. [ABCNEWS, Abcnews.com]

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in the country.” [NEWSDAY, March 7, 1989, p.4]

“Islam is the fastest-growing religion in the United States…” [NEW YORK TIMES, Feb 21, 1989, p.1]

Moslems are the world’s fastest-growing group…”  [USA TODAY, The Population Reference bureau, Feb. 17,
1989, p.4A ]

“Muhummed is the most successful of all Prophets and religious personalities. ” [Encyclopedia Britannica]

“There are more Muslims in North America then Jews Now.” [Dan Rathers, CBSNEWS]

“Islam is the fastest growing religion in North America.” [TIMES MAGAZINE]

“Islam continues to grow in America, and no one can doubt that!” [CNN, December 15, 1995]

“The Religion of Islam is growing faster than any other religion in the world.”  [MIKE WALLACE, 60 MINUTES]

Thank you Pastor Terry Jones For your service to Islam!

1. Thanks for making Quran a bestseller.More copies of the Qur’an and Islamic Literature were sold on Amazon, local and online Islamic stores, thus providing humanity an opportunity to read and ponder over God’s guidance for humanity.
2. Thanks for the business.More people bought Islamic literature, along with the Quran, generating extra revenue for the Islamic stores.
3. More individuals visited the mosques to attend Muslim open houses and Islam presentations, thus receiving the wonderful message of Islam.

4. More individuals called on the GainPeace’s outreach hotline 800-662-ISLAM and inquired about the faith of Islam, giving Muslims an opportunity to explain Islam to our fellow citizens. You generated more publicity for Islam, then all our past outreach campaigns combined.

5. More people Googled the words ‘Islam’ and ‘Quran’. The more that you spoke about Islam and the Quran, more people came to Muslim websites to learn about the truth of Islam.

6. Libraries were busy loaning out copies of the Quran. Yes, libraries across the USA, Canada and Europe were busy lend out copies of the Quran to its patrons.

7. Thanks for saving the Muslims advertisement dollars. The free publicity to the words ‘Quran’ and ‘Islam’, that you gave, Muslims could have spent millions of dollars but couldn’t have generated the same publicity and attention of the media, and thanks to you, the word of God (the Quran) became a household word.

8. Thanks for waking up the Muslims. Muslim all across the world are now more passionate about the wonderful and peaceful faith of Islam and are eager to share it with their neighbors, colleagues, friends and humanity.

9. Thanks for encouraging more people to embrace Islam. We had more people calling, learning and embracing Islam in the past few weeks, then we ever had since the last 40 years.

10. Thanks for uniting the people of conscience, the Muslim, the Jews, the Christians, the Hindus, and the atheist, on the common platform of goodness, love and tolerance and against hatred, bias and bigotry.

Pastor Terry Jones, we pray that you actually read the Quran with an open mind and heart and ponder over its message of the oneness of God. If you love Jesus, follow the religion of Jesus, the religion of Jesus was Islam, submission to the The Creator. May God, enlighten you to the truth of Islam and that you start worshiping the One Creator as was preached and practiced by Prophets Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus and Muhammad, peace be upon them. Welcome to Islam.

Dr. Sabeel Ahmed
Director
The GainPeace Project, USA
Info@GainPeace.com

Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam?

i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

1. Definition of Polygamy

Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?

2. The Qur’an is the only religious scripture in the world that says, “marry only one”.

The Qur’an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ‘marry only one’. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.

3. Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims

The report of the ‘Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam’, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.

4. Qur’an permits limited polygyny

As I mentioned earlier, Qur’an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ‘marry only one’. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur’an:

“Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one.”

[Al-Qur’an 4:3]

Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

“Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women….”

[Al-Qur’an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do’s and Don’ts:

> ‘Fard’ i.e. compulsory or obligatory

> ‘Mustahab’ i.e. recommended or encouraged

> ‘Mubah’ i.e. permissible or allowed

> ‘Makruh’ i.e. not recommended or discouraged

> ‘Haraam’ i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.

5. Average life span of females is more than that of males

By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.

6. India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide

India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.

7. World female population is more than male population

In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.

8. Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical

Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

Courtesy: Dr. Zakir Naik